Surfing helps, but I know the best thing for healing is time. I m 21 years old and just find out that I m pragnant for 2-3 weeks. When he parks in front of my school, in front of parents carrying in their babies and small children, I call Planned Parenthood and schedule an abortion for ten days from now. Maybe you're frightened. I know her from my dreams. I was a late-in-life baby, the fourth child born when my mom was 42 in 1959. And while sometimes they are not always as sensitive to the subject as Id like (not on purpose) it feels so relieving to tell someone. I tell him I dont want an abortion, but nothing about this makes sense. And, I dont know If I ever would have met my husband of now and not really sure of he would stick around with me having a kid from somebody else but regrets are one of the worst thing that you go though when you make a decision like this. I want more than anything to be a mom. I felt a sense of love and attachment to the baby I knew I had to let go. Hi. Everyone had always said about decisions like this that you need to be 100% sure either way but I wasnt sure either way at all. Mothers should never be bored of their children. I feel I would regret it everyday for the rest of my life. Me too A M, August the 30th. A Letter to the Girl Who's Considering an Abortion March 25, 2021 by Lindsay Smith Hi Sweet Girl, I don't need to know your name or look into your eyes, and I don't need to have been where you find yourself tonight to know that you're terrified and in pain. Thank you for sharing. A heart touching letter from a unborn baby to his mother baby is very happy when he is conceived and think that his mother is world's best mom and he share his happiness with his mother telling her all his activities and growing stages in her tummy but his parents decide to abort this baby.. prayatn Follow Advertisement Advertisement Recommended She and her boyfriend are claiming that, if they could go back in time, they would have kept it. I dont know what to do. I have a 13 year old with my boyfriend and we live together. I loved you, my first, my only." The afternoon I found out I was pregnant with you was just like any other day waiting for my period: I was late. I have been looking for support from this side. The following article is one I submitted back in March 2017. Good luck with that husband. Although your husband is not supportive now, he no doubt will grow to love your little child. I had an abortion many years ago and I was fine with it because I absolutely knew I was in the right place. She was worth fighting for. Raising her was not easy on my own but he convinced me to move back so he can have his family. I'm just a tiny someone, I miss my baby every day. Im sad, but dont regret it. I was pregnant for the first time when I was 29 years old . A postabortion woman wrote the following letter to her aborted baby, who she named Grace: "Everyone close to me was affected by that awful day - none more so than you and I though. I have a three year old. What you did in your life is your history and your past and whatever you choose to share with your husband, or what he found out on his own, is a privilege; it is your truth and what he knows of that, he should consider as an honor, because it is your unique story to tell. The baby daddy is crying too because we have a lot to achieve in life and this isnt what we expected. Anger boils in me now and again over it. This brought me to tears. The Baby Must Be. Letter to My Child - Abortion Memorial What is the Abortion Memorial? If you can't take My boyfriend was completely supportive of me and even now when I talk about the baby he knows that it makes me feel better. Your baby. You were crying, but I was dealing with the most pain of all. I hope that there wasnt a little soul in there yet . I want to experience the excitement of my first day at school I had my abortion at 5 weeks and 1 day i knew it was the right thing to do but i did want my baby I was scared but overwhelmed i didnt want to go thru what i did i remember a time i was for abortion but until u have to go thru one u have no right to talk i too also got my sonogram which was supposed to be a joyful experience it still was because wow it was beautiful .i love and hope to see my baby one day .. On the day of the appointment I cried so much I couldnt get myself to do it and as time went on I decided to keep him. I am not waiting for my appointment in about 10 days for now. I m a thai women but I moved to England to live with my husband , he is 34 years old and weve been together nearly 3 years. Except for some personal references her letter is reproduced in full. I really commend you Shawn. Hi. It has the potential to work, but like you said, doesnt make sense no matter how hard you look at it. nothing was ever the same between us. I dont think Ill ever forgive myself, I dropped out of school and my life is a mess. Don't Forget That I Was Here By My boyfriend was with me when I took the test. Financially we are already tight. My bf convinced me we werent ready. I aborted even though my heart ached and I loved it every day. Hi Mikal, I understand how torn you feel. I have a toddler and Im pregnant again. I didnt want anyone in the world to have my baby, I didnt want the guy that knocked me up to have my baby and I also felt a little pushed by his mother to have the abortion so instead of keeping him or her for myself I killed my baby. Oh, Honey. All of this is to saymom, you have a child, it's me. Its so unfair that guys help in making the baby. Hes worried our quality of life will suffer for the whole family. Before the devil knew me, God knew me, he created everything. My heart is so crushed. My pregnancy was miserable I was depressed and anxious all the time and often wondered if I made the right choice but the day my son was born I knew I made the right choice. I had an abortion past the point of having the pill so had to have the surgery, It was the most painful time of my life physically and emotionally and I never expected it would continue to haunt me. Thank you for this I hope one day Ill find a way to be okay, I really feel stupid and sad Im pregnant and everyone doesnt support my relation ship.i now want to abort and sadly get over my man. We have been having the same unprotected sex as we were while still together. We were in this sad nightmare together, weren't we? I feel like I dont know what to do with myself. Take care. I want a burrito. I just found out Im pregnant after splitting with my partner and having already gone through 2 miscarriages. I feel like I have to get the abortion or he will resent me and our relationship will be over. Jocelyn Miller is a Montessori teacher in San Francisco who spends her weekdays supporting the growth, development, and independence of young children. Am i allowed to feel i did it for the baby? I hate myself already and now my boyfriend hates me too and I feel trapped. My periods had always been very irregular and I had taken over the counter tests when it got late but I got negatives the both times so I was certain I wasnt pregnant. I just him so much (I dreamt he was a boy) I feel like no one understands how I feel and the support I need to great of what other could provide. We dont say any words, but our embraces tell each other that we did the right thing. I paced the bathroom, test in hand, pants still around my ankles, repeating curses to myself like a meditative mantra. Thank you for this. My heart is breaking but I cant have another child on my own. "But I could hear her cry. Then, my eyes glued to the test as if it were revealing to me the secrets of the universe, I stared. I dont know you but it seems to me that if you went through with it, it was 100% the right thing to do. Your dad talks about how hes an alcoholic, out-of-work barista. I then found out he was cheating on me big time it was scary my first thought was omg I cant have this monsters baby but I still carried on with the pregnancy a little unsure but over time he got more abusive, still treating me badly he started saying get rid of the baby idc . I was pretty much pressured to become pregnant by my boyfriend at the time (now very ex). The way you wrote it felt so close to home for me and i just wanted to say thank-you, thank-you, thank-you. She told me he has a live in girlfriend for 6 years and the girl has a 10 year old son that is not his but he helped raise. I was 5 weeks pregnant. Im 33. Im doing my final major project in my fashion degree and want my final collection to be inspired by my experience. My younger half sister is also pregnant with a girl which I always thought I would have. I looked at them and I couldnt believe that that potential was now inside me. In a saline abortion procedure, caustic saline solution was injected into the mother's womb. If it makes you feel any better, abortion is highly unlikely to affect your future fertility equally though Im missing my baby a lot. She felt because of the drugs it was best to have an abortion. God will see you through. I wish I could advise a podcast or supportive tv bit for her to watch. Must be awful. I instantly regretted it I changed my mind the day of my surgery but the nurse said I may have a miscarriage because I took the pill the day before . I am 31 and have a 4 year old and an 8 year old step daughter. About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features Press Copyright Contact us Creators . Thank you for this. And I dont feel well. My sister just found out she is pregnant and I congratulated her on the phone. Weve trien for 8 yeats now and decided that if I turned 30 which is Dec of this year and I am not pregnant, we will give up. I am actually praying that it . It is simply not a choice anyone wants to make. I was overjoyed but crushed the next day after he told me we werent ready and that I should get rid of it. I didn't know you, but I loved you. You can always come back. I tell her, I cant. Im honest enough with myself to know that if I leave, I will never will come back. I just turned 21,everyone wants me to keep the baby and I want to be a mom but I dont at the same time. When I found out I was pregnant, was overcome with fear. im so lost on how to proceed. Thank you for sharing your story. I dont want to get in trouble I just dont know what to think anymore. Little Thing, I want you to be happy. It's a first-person account of a single mom who had an abortion - and nearly died - just two years after abortion became legal across the United States. Xx. and I have no clue what to do. And because I am one, I made the right decision. Im sure it goes without saying from reading about my childhood but I have mental health issues and Im not sure having a child of my own is something I will ever be mentally ready for, but I certainly wasnt then. In my mind, Ive raised a child on my own, and even with all the struggles, raising her has been the most rewarding experience ever. And understand that by forcing your boyfriend to do something he isnt ready for you may ruin your relationship with him. Were you touched by this poem? I love him he doesnt exactly feel the same, as per the way our relationship has gone these last few Years which caused it to end. I hate that Im stuck with making this decision. Im lost and have a follow up appointment in 2 weeks to test my hcg levels by that time is will be 8 weeks almost 9. I had my first and only abortion 10 years ago at age 22, my partner who turned into my husband were together for only 2 months and the uncertainty left me with the choice to dissolve my pregnancy at 5 weeks. Because I was born, because I can talk and breathe air and because you can visibly see me in front of your face, I had the "right" to take my first baby's life away. She is 23, theyve been together 6 months and shes not ready for such a huge commitment. Today its been 1 year since the surgery. My boy ( yes, For some crazy reason at that time, I wanted to find out the sex of the baby through the blood test they do to check chromosomes and it was a boy) would be 7 years old. Hi Melanie, just dont do it! Its a hard decision, Hi there Im in the same situation, dont know what to do Im so sick ? I dont know how I got to this point of being so mistreated and lost. And way farther along than I thought. Im praying that I get an opportunity to meet her one day .. look into her sweet little face and just hold her and never ever let her go. I did regret it but I cant imagine hows my life would had been if I didnt do it. Xx, I found out I was pregnant on this day a year ago and like you I was scared. I am 40 and do not want another child with my husband because he is not supportive at all. You don't know me yet, I'm only a few weeks old. Its been 7 years since my abortion, and I miss her. Because we still didnt get married when our family asked us we use to say next year next year but now I dont think if its ever gone happen. Im up and down about it all. She wo t talk to anyone as she feels she would be seen as weak. I was shocked. He met my dad. I havent spoken to my parents yet. I had one 7 years ago and my one and only. From a mother's letter to her aborted child: "It's been a decade and still my blood runs cold and I catch my breath whenever I hear the word " abortion." Space there is an emptiness inside of me that can never be filled, a chill that has never quite been warned, a grief that will Continue reading "A Mother's Letter to Her Aborted Baby" So afraid. This was so emotional ? I am 31 and had an abortion in November last year at 10 weeks pregnant, which was later than I thought too. I know it sounds irresponsible to have sex with a man that Im not with unprotected. He now know about it and wants to end our marriage of 4 years. Its what he wants. The law has no exception to allow an abortion to save the life of . Do I honor my heart and have another sweet lamb, potentially subjecting this human to another absentee parent who secretly resents their existence- OR- do I get the abortion. I feel like shit because I was raised that this was wrong. I cry. I thought I was the problem. That exact day I started bleeding I went to the ER and they said I might miscarry again I told him and he is convinced I am going to lose the baby. Oh and one more thing abortion doesnt affect your fertility. Iv never felt worse in my whole life. All I wanted to do was feel your skin and smell you. I, well, thankfully few days ago I conceived in your tummy. Rapid thoughts flooded my brain. This apparently isnt convincing enough, and he asks if Ive taken any more havent I considered it could be a false positive? We just dont know what we actually want, since we decided to not have children. I got an abortion two years ago and while I know it was the right decision it is something I still mourn, that was my first and my only as well and this article HITS HOME. Me and my boyfriend have our own issues and this time he wanted me to keep this baby but I told him Im not ready to become a mother. You will always be part of my heart, and I know that if someday I see two pink lines again, it will be you coming back to me. Not how I thought I would live my life. My husband was in prison, I cheated on him, got pregnant, he gave me the choice between keep my baby or our marriage. The copyright of all poems on this website belong to the individual authors. Even with his support, the support of my mother, sister, and friends.. I dont have the financial capability to take care of a child. Yes, he did everything he was supposed to and yes the tests afterwards declared him sterile. Sharla Ynostrosa | 01/11/2021. My best friend just found out she is pregnant a few days ago and she is only 19. I'll sing loudly in my first school concert Just found out im pregnant as of today 6/18/2019. According to Florida's Reducing Fetal and Infant Mortality law, which was implemented last July, abortions are prohibited after 15 weeks of gestation, with a few exceptions, including one that. I ask for the pill and she hands me it along with a cup of water. God has forgiven you and you should try and forgive yourself. I was promoted to junior teacher two weeks ago. Like you, I could not have made a life for my baby at that time. I wanted it to be beautiful and for us both to be so happy but the day I told him his first words were you have to abort it the way his face was was like I ripped his whole life from under him it wasnt a face of being scared to be a dad it was a face that only a person who had a secret would make I cant understand him because we clearly had a lot of sex that was unprotected how could we not feel like this would happen eventually I just dont understand at all he knows that I love him so he started to say things like Im selfish for wanting to bring a child into this world he doesnt want he grew up without a dad and I wouldnt understand, he said if I have this baby it will pull us further apart and he will never be able to look at me he said I was a liar because I have told him Im down for him and thats not being down for him. My heart tells me it wa a girl. I feel so torn apart. I dont want to undo my choice, but its still so hard to live with sometimes. Thats the last burrito hell ever order without any major care in the world. Maybe you feel as if your world has been turned upside-down. It would have killed me alive to have given birth to those children and given them a life they did not deserve. Im ready,but am I really ready? We argued and I prayed on it. I dont know what to do but I see no way out of this. Whitney. But I cant help but feel a deep sense of loss and regret over ending the pregnancy. . But I'll also give you plenty of hugs and kisses And make you scream and shout, Each day, I will continually honor you and thank you for making the sacrifice so I could become a head teacher and get my Masters degree; so your dad could take the steps he needed to stop drinking. I have to go through a second one and I dont know what to do. I recently found out I was pregnant after having a late period. Physically or health wise and its not suppose to be this way. Praying for all of you and I know now every situation is so different. Diary of an Unborn Child is the title of an anonymously-written anti-abortion article which was first read on the floor of the New York Senate in 1970. In a letter shared in advance with the Guardian and sent on . I was 17 yrs old when I got pregnant, At that age I was not ready, alot of expectations from my parents await me plus the fact that I got pregnant by the person I dont love.so Ive decided to abort it by means of massage. Please keep your baby. I hoped the pain and loss in my gut would fade away over time but it hasnt. But I dont regret it either. Every night I went to bed, I cried. The abortion debate has been going on for ages. Im Ill never be sure if I made the right decision, but Im financially incompetent right now. But I do not regret it. Thats when I called him and told him he needed to come home, that I wasnt mad at him anymore for all the horrible things he had recently done, and that we needed to talk. Its been 3 months since my abortion. All their comments are stressing me out and getting me really down. It's me. Sending love to all of you going through this situation . Im not ready for kids. March 8, 2014 at 4:36 pm. Im grateful I was in a position to have options and make a choice as a woman. This broke him completely when I got the abortion done. You were there, so was my existence. I had an abortion back in 1999. I am experiencing so much guilt and pain going through this again, especially since I am 32 years old with no children and two months away from completing my masters. This would have delayed everything. I wish I wouldve bought her plan b or made sure she was taking her birth control but those options are completely out of reach now. I was six weeks pregnant . My parents would have had to raise the child on the other side of the country and I knew I wouldnt have been able to bear being away from it. ? (Sense my sarcasm, little one.) I'm still alive. I know what I will do and why I feel it is the best choice I can make, but I will never forget this little tiny creature that has visited me and wanted so much to be my family, as I so wanted to be hers/his. We chose to end our family after two children. Please please please pray for us so that my darling would come back to me. Im 18 and also 6 weeks pregnant and my boyfriend says I have to abort it. I thought the tears would stop but they dont. But its her decision in the end. As a pro-life advocate, I've written and submitted many articles pertaining to abortion to our local newspaper. I stand beside her and encourage her that she made the best decision she could. Im almost 6 weeks pregnant and although I want this baby, my husband does not. I need to make my mind ??? No matter how he was conceived this baby wasnt a mistake not to me. I wish I could have kept him/her. The first question the nurse asks is, What was the first day of your last period?, and I burst into tears. Please don't cry, remember that I love you and I'll be waiting for you with open arms. I live with my boyfriend hes 39yrs old. My partner abandoned me and I had no money. Im not financially free..and my boyfriend said he will literally kill me if I decide to keep the baby. Days away from her second abortion, she wrote that getting the abortion is the "right decision for myself, my daughter, and this child." Yet we faced a third pregnancy two years after deciding that our family was complete. This poem represents the voice of an unborn child pleading for its life. My mother killed me. If you are in the position to do so, please consider becoming a SMBC (single mom by choice). On the way to the apartment he called and asked if I was hungry. I was accepted into the Montessori teacher training program two days prior. the world makes us feel weak. I was in a a similar position. But the six-week deadline contrasts starkly with early American abortion law, where the procedure was legal until "quickening"the first time a mother feels the baby kick, which can happen . We sit in silence for a little while, then I ask him to sit next to me, and he does, all the while looking surprised. I just had an abortion a couple days ago and I was 7 weeks. I knew that if I went in for an ultrasound and saw features on that monitor.. there was no way I could go through with it. We dont regret it. I still was no where near ready for how much my life would have to change. Sometimes I still feel her, I pray that shes come back. That is my "right." When we want our baby in womb then it is a baby. I was so lonely and had nobody to talk to, man I really thought I was gonna go crazy when we took the break. I was 5 weeks. This is my first time reading a story that actually resonates with the bittersweetness if my own experience. I did an abortion 10 years ago and never disclosed to my them boyfriend who is now my husband. Im 28 now and I dont see having a kids in the future maybe because I cant forgive myself with what Ive done. I feel like Im losing either way; if I get an abortion, Ill most likely regret it, and if I dont, Ill struggle as a single mother. Im stressed and feel so alone. I just wanted to say thank you for writing this. Praying for you! Ive had 3 surgeries for endometriosis and fibroids. My boyfriend has two children ages 18 and 13. Now Im thinking an abortion is my only option, I kicked him out last night. My boyfriend told me to abort mine and I dumped him and made that decision on my own. Good luck on your decision if you havent made up your mind yet but no matter what, I am sure it will be the best decision for you. I am so sorry you had to go through this. I am with someone now and he is lovely. In 1971 a Catholic woman who wrote this letter had an abortion in New York. If you do not live with your parents, but you live with a grandparent, or an adult aunt or uncle, the adult relative you live with may be told in place of your parents. Anyway. Youre feelings and emotions emulate mine. Its been really hard. I would never say that Im over it and my biggest regret is not being careful enough to avoid getting pregnant in the first place. I feel manipulated and trapped. I loved this poem so much, it made me cry. He walks into the front room while I am mid-stand, so thats how I greet him. I now have learnt something new about myself i will absolutely love to be a mother one day. The 'pro-choice' movement argues that a woman should have a choice to keep . I like the word dad because Father is in Heaven. My and my husband have been diagnosed with infertility. Now, faced with having one in our early 40s is terrifying. I move into the mini-counseling session with your dad, and we are firm on our decision. All the best xxxx, Hi Owami, your message speaks to me because I was completely alone too. Im broken over this. Ive worked hard to get here and set myself into a schedule for still working, still being able to play with my daughter and somehow study. Not as alone because feeling my baby every night move around gives me hope. It breaks my heart to know that the only two times Ive been pregnant ended with me terminating. I had a late term surgical abortion, against my will. My significant other is leaving the decision to me and will support either way it goes but I just dont know what to do. I am with someone who I cant bring myself to tell and I am starting to feel emotionally and mentally effected by it. I dont regret it but I do have feeling about what if. I feel like its hard to find forums where women arent either all regret or all confidant/fine with their decision. I dont blame you for choosing to terminate your pregnancy. Best of luck! A judge can excuse you from this requirement. I have been sleeping with a guy unprotected for a year now last month I got pregnant and I had a miscarriage I never told him because we are not together. I stared and I watched the second line darken and become more prominent. We don't need to live in a big fancy house, How I wish I was brave enough to shrugged off the opinion of other people,my friends and family. I cry. I decide abortion at week 6. All I ask of you is your love and a chance to love you back. Share Your Story Here. Thank you so much for this. For the first time in my life. I found out Im 6 weeks pregnant last week. I was very confused. I thought about how I had just lost my job, just went back to school, was still struggling with grief from a lost loved one and trying to take care of my mom while still trying to learn how to take care of myself. And then I blurt out, without any grace, and much louder than I intend, Im pregnant. His eyes get wide as frisbees and he says, Wait. In pregnancy, to be "late term" means to be past 41 weeks gestation, or past a patient's due date. We agonized over what to do and spent a week making our decision which whilst incredibly painful was ultimately the right one for us. I know I would feel his kicks by now. So not really any adult guidance, or access to the financial resources parents often avail their young-adult children. I felt very depressed after I let you go - many days were hard to face, some I didn't. I told myself it was hormones. Abortion pills are the most common way to end a pregnancy in the United States and have become a focus for anti-abortion groups and Republican officials seeking to block access in their states. I know the abortion has made me realise how much of an amazing mum I am going to be but I am also so desperate to be a mummy and the loss in my gut cant be put into words. Im going to mourn the abortion. My partner said he would support me either way but I knew deep down to him it might as well have been the end of the world. I always wanted to be a mum I adore children but back then I couldnt keep it . Im struggling with my decision and I almost wish someone could just make it for me. I cried every day leading up to me making a decision, and I set the appointment for the very next day after I decided so that I would not have much time to change my mind. I swallow hard several times until the pill burrows into the back of my throat like a rock. Family assumes that I just dont want to have them, when in reality, now, is that no one will have one with me. It's just cruel." Below is the letter from the woman to her baby in full and without edits. The dad and I had talked about having another child after 3.5 yrs. I sit there like that until I hear the front door open and your dad walks in. I know I made the right decision, but seeing him with his kids now breaks my heart bc he didnt want the one with me right now. All other content on this website is Copyright 2006-2023 FFP Inc. All rights reserved. I just hope that I can. Published by Family Friend Poems November 2008 with permission of the author. I made the wrong choice.